Month: March 2019

Shame

Shame is a painful emotion caused by consciousness of guilt, shortcoming, or impropriety. Although very painful, the capacity for shame is healthy and part of being human. The function of shame is to prevent us from damaging our relationships and motivate us to repair them if we’ve damaged them.  As Brene Brown explains, guilt says “I’ve …

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Predicting anxious patterns

As you set yourself up to relate effectively to anxiety, you want to predict the phases of your anxious pattern, so that you know what strategies you will need. The phases tend to be different depending on whether the trigger was external or internal.  Anticipatory anxiety, situational anxiety, and post-event processing In the case of …

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Avoidance v. workable behaviors and preferences

Avoidance happens. Avoidance creates every type of suffering. You suffer. Suffering is pain plus resistance. Resistance and avoidance are functionally synonymous.  Sometimes acting in accordance with your values and experiential avoidance will be the same behaviors. The difference between your values-driven action and avoidance is your attitude. Workable behavior is a dynamic adaptation based on your context, rather …

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Fixed Attentional Focus

Another response mechanism that creates, maintains and intensifies psychological suffering is fixed attentional focus.  The attentional bias in worry and OCD tends to be threat-related stimuli. Social anxiety is maintained by a self-focused attentional bias. Depression is maintained by a ruminative attentional bias.   When you are worrying or stuck in obsessive content, your mind …

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